I never thought I be scared of anything not least being claustrophobic. I was quite sure I had no fear of anything or at least none that I know of yet. That was the question the radiographer asked me and I assured him that no I wasn’t claustrophobic. But like they said, hindsight is always 20/20.
Anyway, I got myself prep up for this procedure. Not that I not been through this before so when I saw the gleaming machine with its tunnel like chamber, it was a familiar sight. So was the loud sound. As instructed, I put my head into the head holder. The guy put 2 paddings on the side to keep my head in place and told me not to move. He gave me a buzzer thingy to hold and told me to press it if I need help. I was like – are you serious?
Then the cover came down over the head. There was a glass panel for me to see through so I wasn’t in darkness. The guy told me to close my eyes, not to move and then the machine started. The all familiar sound came on. The ear plug I had inserted didn’t seem to help much though but actually the sound was rather reassuring. Then it happened! I suddenly felt like I couldn’t breathe. There was a queasy feeling in the stomach and I thought I was going into a panic attack. I had never experience something like that before. And to make it worse, I couldn’t move at all. Actually I could move but then the procedure will have to be prolonged until they can get a proper reading. So I stuck it out. I opened my eyes and immediately I felt better. So I choose to keep my eyes open and look at the shadows, the little bit of the lab that I can see from the little glass panel. I also found that trying to swallow help but was worried that the slight movement of the mouth and throat may affect the reading. Every now and then the urge to scream and push everything away came but I fought hard to resist it. So this was how it was like being buried alive. I thought to myself. Fortunately, my time is not up,
But eventually after what seems like an eternity, the radiographer came in. It was only 30 minutes but this was probably the longest 30 minutes of my life.